Long Day

Omg how sad is this.... I have spent one looong day at work. I feel bored and while yes I love my job I found myself reminicing about my days as a barista. My days where never boring especially in the heart of NYC. All my regular customers I miss so much , the compliments, the special requests to have me be the one to make thier annoying drinks lol

So many days while worked in Starbucks where after it got dull with the new machines I hated going to work. I still miss the interactions everyday, it was never monotonous. Not to mention free coffee.

So I miss it soo much maybe I will do it as a summer job lol It was fun afterall gone a few years and I miss it.

LOL

Ha someone has is kinda right lol According to this guys standard I should be 105 lbs! that would mean losing 13 lbs!!! Geez!

"It's simple to determine what she should weigh. A woman 5 ft tall should weigh 100 pounds. Add 5 pounds for each additional inch. (Guys start at 106 for 5 ft tall and add 6 pounds per extra inch). "

That was a guys comment on Jessica Simpson lol So much for falling in love and beign fat and happy !

From the Frisky some awesome Advice!!!

By Judy McGuire




(The Frisky) -- The biggest, baddest, most terrifying part of falling in love is opening up and letting yourself be vulnerable. When it works, love can seem like the stuff of fairytales: you meet someone, you get to know and like each other, you enter into a mutually trusting and respectful relationship, you fall deeply, madly, hopelessly in love, and you live happily ever after.

There are certain types of men that women should avoid so they won't get played.

At least, for a while.
But all too often it works out less well. Trust is shattered. Hearts get broken. Tears are shed.
Once a lady's been put through the emotional wringer a few (dozen) times, she gets a little wary. A little closed off. She can start to mistrust her judgment. Second-guess her gut. Worry she's going to die alone, leaving behind a feline-gnawed corpse and a stack of tear-stained Netflix romantic comedies.
So, it's not always easy to know whether to let someone in or if you should just flip the "ditch switch," instead. On the one hand, you want to be open to the possibilities, but, on the other hand, nobody wants to be a sucker.
Once you finally decide to hoist yourself back up and onto that dating pony, here are a couple types to watch out for:

1. He has children he doesn't see and/or support. Make no mistake -- kids can really slap a stinky, wet diaper on the flames of love. Your guy might blow you off because his toddler's running a fever, or maybe he doesn't have much money because he's doling out child support. As annoying as this may be, the upside is it shows he's a responsible adult.
Deadbeat dads can start out as a lot of fun, but how he treats his children is a good indicator of how he's going to treat you. If he can abandon his own flesh and blood, you can be sure his loyalties are as flexible as your yoga teacher's spine.
2. All his ex-girlfriends are "crazy." Chances are if all the women he's dated are nuts, his behavior likely went a long way towards making them that way.
3. He's heavily invested in his "persona." We all know guys like this. Richard is the crazy life-of-the-party guy! Then there's Jon, the sarcastic intellectual. Dean is heavily influenced by 1940s gangster style; his clothing is all vintage, and his apartment is like a time capsule circa your granny.
While these dudes might be appealing, they rarely get real. Richard may be charming, but being around someone who's always "on" is exhausting. Jon may be the smartest guy you've ever met, but he can also be the cruelest. And Dean? Well, he's hot, but he spends so much time looking back, how can he possibly look towards the future?
4. He's a compliment miser. The guy you're dating should make you feel like the prettiest, funniest, smartest, most amazing creature in the entire stratosphere. That's not to say he should spew inane flattery 24/7, but he should tell you how hot you are at least once a week -- if not more often.
Because if you're not the prettiest, funniest, smartest, most amazing creature who's ever crossed his path, what the heck is he doing dating you in the first place?
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Wow

So yesterday I was at work and saw my phone ring and answered it as if someone told me to. I normally do not do this but I just knew it was important. Turned out it was my Dr. telling me that I have a very severe thyroid problem and that I needed to go to the endocrinologist right away. By 11 am I was there and I found out I will be on Thyroid medication for the rest of my life! Ouch it definitly came as a shock when the Dr. basically told me I have three choices for the treatment of my now diagnosed Toxic Nodule Thyroid Disease. 1. surgery and medication for life, 2. medication only with a 1% of it working efficiently, or 3. Radioiodine therapy to destroy my thyroid and then medication for life.

Well anyway despite the news and then spending the rest of the day and night on my couch doing absolutely nothing wondering what my life is going to be like. I can't remember to take a vitamin daily! now its going not an option not to remember. Well despite that I woke up this morning and wow I havent felt this good in a while maybe it was just a relief knowing what is wrong. So I went about the morning and so far so good maybe im in denial. But I hadnt felt this energized in a long time and even on my drive to work I just felt something was different.

Something is different. When you know you love someone you never question your love but its amazing when it grows. My ex husband whom I informed of my present condition and that I would have to undergo the therapy which will require me to stay about 4 feet away from people for several days to avoid passing on the radiation and possibly destrying thier metabolic system, made it veery clear he does not intend to take care of his children for those few days and protect them from any danger. But yesterday before I even told Nic that I my ex would not be steppin up to that responsibility he volunteered to help me. Now that is amazing and while I will try and find other routes to this because I dont think him havign to use his leave time to do this is fair, Its amazing just to know that he would do that for us.

Something else is different too. Obama signed a bill I have been campaining for since I found out about it. The Lilly Leddbetter fair pay act of 2009!!! That is an amazing feeling to know our voices were heard. Not sure if it will make a huge difference to me at the moment but just knowing that it is now in the past that a single mother would be makign 60 cents to a mans dollar!

My New Obsession

http://puppyjustice.com/ So on Cnn today I find out that in Seattle Washington there was a massive puppymill from which about 600 dogs where rescued and 200 of those pregnant and due to have over 1,200 puppies. The cost of that is going to be massive and yet they still cannot beigin to start putting these animals up for adoption.

So now my new obsession is to adopt some puppies once this all starts happening. Lol and Ha a GOOD reason to go on a roadtrip.

Wow

So a woman had octoplets in California, celebrities are giving birth left and right to twins. This so called trend seems to really be on the rise. So are the quick walk in walk out Dr. prescriptions for clomid etc. Just leaves me to think just how normal is this? Is there possibly a link to why there are also so many cases of ADD/ADHD and Autism are on the rise? While I do feel very lucky to have concieved my own children without drugs and I do feel prescriptions for legit cases of feritility problems are ok. Getting on fertility drugs just to boost your chances of getting pregnant within a certain time period is just risky and one I just wouldn't take. The risks of carrying multiple babies is just too high and dangerous, I can't even begin to imagine the numerous developmental issues those octuplets just may have. Its like a march of dimes case in the making. Babies are meant to be born at 40 weeks of gestation. Anything below 36 weeks is considered preterm. Twins are more likely to be born at 34 weeks and are usually about a pound or so less than single babies. The octuplets where born at a mere 32 weeks and even that was an accomplishment for that many babies! and while yes drs do have the technology these days to keep a baby alive if born past 27 weeks, if you read any of the baby books you will see how much happens in those last few long weeks and just how many issues they may have. To be honest it just really bothers me to hear about stories like this. But I guess selective reduction also really bothers me as well and it is something many parents who use fertility drugs do to ensure that they have at least one healthy baby. Can people please just let nature take its course once your ready to have children, they do say most couples will concieve within one year of trying and while it may be hard to deal with the frustration of not getting instant gratification dont get desperate within one or two months of trying and get on drugs that are unecessary and then wind up with so many issues.

Last one of the Day

Ok so I was bored and took an online quiz the topic? What will make you leave your man???

My result and OH SOO DEFINITY TRUE

Result: A Guy who is a Womanizer
The idea of a strong marriage is your priority. Loyalty and trust are the factors needed to attain this goal. When a third party comes to the picture, it will distort the relationship. You just can’t imagine yourself sharing your man with another woman and definitely, cheating will be your valid reason to leave your man.

Laugh until I CRY and laugh some more

I must say there has been allot of venting about my ex this week most likely because he can't control himself. And So I laugh and cry and then laugh some more. I laugh when he says things like " I have never loved and hated someone so much in my life" I cry when my life feels impossible and he only adds to it with verbal abuse saying messed up things about my dating life. LoL im a slut for having dated 2-3 guys in a year of being separated and being with Nic for just about 6 months LMAO. And then I laugh even harder when he says I cant clean up after myself or cook a decent meal at a decent time. All I ever feel like telling him is you marry a wife not your mother. I was not there to do your laundry, cook and have a hot dinner on the table for you nor a plate in the fridge for after your party session of actually being a man whore. Over 30 women over one year and while I was pregnant now that is a disgrace! and disgusting. Lying to your new girl and telling her you weren't married when a divorce nor a separation was in the works all while stringing your wife along , neglecting to mention that kids are involved now that is how to start a relationship good luck. And to be that poor girl with such low self esteem to stay with him after that type of lie, I was once that girl I fell for the lies and didn't realize how much I was worth or that I deserve a thousand times better. I'll break you and then I will buy you a pretty necklace is not a way to live. And I did I found a million times better.

Be jealous because when my house is clean it is for me and my kids, when I cook dinner its because I feel like cooking, when I do Nic's laundry if he ever lets me its because I want to and I would do it for him anytime. Or is it because my relationship is not based on lies and while he is out drowning in bars and one nighters , we live the happiness most people strive for and go out partying looking for.

I no longer drink to forget. I live to remember.

A Military Vent and New found Respect...

So today during my usual reading on cnn.com I have read to articles one on 4 Us Soldier that where killed in Iraq, and another on how hard it is on the Police men and women to tell someone "ma'am your son was murdered" especially over the telephone. They briefly mention the military tradition of a knock on the door. So while I never actually lived it in the true sense , I have to say allot of people forget what those military wives go through. Its like an unspoken rule if you live on post or in the surrounding area you always , always call before showing up at someones home because we all know what its like to not be expecting any company and there goes the "knock, knock" at the front door its like everything stops and goes in slow motion, your heart stops and you quite breathing even for a brief second until you look through the peephole and realize its just your next door neighbor looking to borrow something. It's almost like walking on eggshells for 12-18 months with a brief two week R&R in the middle. And how nerve wrecking that is lol you warn everyone DO NOT DISTURB lol you clean everythign in sight , wash a million loads of laundry, stock all the stuff you just didnt buy for the past few months, and lastly you actually grocery shop and not for Lean Cuisine, and canned soups. Because you know with certainty that you and the children are his priority and home is his first stop on R&R.

This brings me to my new found respect for "girlfriends". Obviously you date a soldier you have to expect training weeks, and deployments it just goes with the title. Which too many women have soiled in the past few years, it used to be soldiers and sailors who had the bad reputations now its the women. Its drilled into them at basic that their girls are back home cheating, and during deployments the numerous dear john letters come by the week as some women succomb to thier loneliness. But for those few truly good girlfriends I have to say I have a new found respect. As Im now looking to a deployment in the near distant future lol aka summer I have to say I had told myself months ago that it was comming and not to be shocked and I am not. But now the questions are streaming into my mind, as a girlfriend how do you survive witout the support groups or onpost living meaning the 50 other women whose men are deployed together, sure there is no worry about knocking on your door because you just plain and simple would be the last to know at least in my case I probably would be, if they get injured well thats just the same unless they call you. A sa girlfriend you dont have access to the FRG not even the right to freak out after not getting an IM or a call for 3 weeks and call the rear d just for an update to calm your nerves. Geez and being a not from "home" girlfriend were do you fall on his list of priority visits for R&R I mean you are JUST a Girlfriend and pretty much just expected to cheat. Do you just grin and bear it for 12 months, having not even gotten the closure of departure ceremonies, or do you even have the right to ask? Do you just remain faithfully celibate for a year wondering where you stand or if its even worth it? because just like we have to go through it the men over there are deployed and many of them get desperate and cheat as well. Or will they meet thier future wives on deployment just as my ex husband did?